Our Top 5 May Obsessions

Between Tax Day, Coachella, midnight screenings of Titanic 3D, and the consumption of a dozen Easter baskets that we “bought for our nieces and nephews,” April has left us a little worse for the wear. Luckily, it seems that May will be a gentler month, with nary a check to the government in sight (unless you count parking tickets, of course). Other than the gradual recovery of our bank accounts, here are the top 5 things we are most looking forward to this month:

1.  Multiple awesome holidays -- You start off the month with Cinco de Mayo (“one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, FLOOR” is kind-of our life motto), round it out on the 13th by celebrating the brave lady who raised you, and bring it to a close with a three-day-weekend that allows for the perfect excuse to celebrate what is also apparently National Barbecue Month. Check out our cute and affordable Mother’s Day gift ideas here, and stay tuned for upcoming articles on Cinco de Mayo festivities and affordable Memorial Day trips. 

2.  The Kentucky Derby -- Just because you won’t be hobnobbing with celebrities and real estate barons in Louisville this weekend doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate this event like a true Southern belle. Throw on the perfect floppy hat and feminine dress, invite over your classiest companions (this might be a small gathering), and serve up some quality Southern fare like fried chicken biscuits. The mint juleps, naturally, should flow like water.

3.  Sprinkles Ice Cream -- First the Sprinkles ATM, and now Sprinkles ice cream? What’s next, an Umami x Sprinkles collaboration (all-beef patty fried in cupcake batter, special-sauce-flavored frosting, bun...or so we imagine). Anyhow, one new frozen treat option will include the serving of ice cream in cupcake tops. Our heart just skipped a beat. Or perhaps that was the early sign of a junk-food-induced heart attack? Either way, we’re starting to think that maybe Beverly Hills isn’t such a bad place to hang out after all.

4.  Dark Shadows -- Finally, a remake about which we can say “we weren’t born yet when the original came out.”  Enough of these 90210-esque resurrections that make us feel like we’re 90 instead of *21.  We’re not actually sure this film looks all that good, and we’re especially suspicious given that the studio appears to be throwing its entire year’s marketing budget behind it, but it’ll give us an excuse to stare at Johnny Depp for a few hours as well as an alternative to suggest when our umpteenth girlfriend tries to drag us to What to Expect When You’re Expecting. 

5.  National Chocolate Chip Day -- What, you haven’t marked your calendar for this one?!? We intend to wake up to banana chocolate chip pancakes with peanut butter syrup (aka Chunky Monkey pancakes), enjoy a chocolate chip muffin or two as a midmorning snack, and then begin indulging at an appropriately late time (say, 3pm) in mini chocolate chip cheesecakes, chocolate chip meringues, and red velvet cupcakes stuffed with chocolate chip cookies.  You think we’re joking on this one, but we are not -- follow us on Instagram (@brokegirlsguide) to watch us gain 15 lbs.  on May 15th.  (Without a doubt, a detox day will be 100% necessary on May 16th.)

*We’re 21...if you then divide by 2, multiply that number by 3, subtract four or five, add 18 months, and take 3 tequila shots.